Moving in together finances: a 12-question checklist

The best way to handle moving in together finances is to talk through about a dozen money questions before you sign the lease. Cover rent, debts, savings, shared spending and the "what if we split up" question, and write the answers down. This checklist gives you each question and a suggested way to answer it.

Boxes on the floor, and one awkward question

Priya and Ben are sitting on the floor of their new flat, surrounded by taped-up boxes. The takeaway is on its way. Ben asks, quite lightly, "So how are we doing the rent?"

Priya had assumed they would split it in half. Ben had assumed it would follow their pay. Nobody was wrong, and nobody had said it out loud.

That gap between what each of you assumes is where most money arguments between new housemates and partners begin. The checklist below closes it before it opens.

How to use this checklist

Do not try to answer all 12 in one sitting. Do four at a time over three evenings, with snacks and no screens.

For each question, say your own answer first, then listen. If you disagree, pick a trial answer for three months. Nothing here is permanent.

Part one: the facts

1. What do each of us earn, and how steady is it?

Share your take-home pay, not just the headline salary. If your income varies, say what a low month looks like.

"After tax I get about X a month. In a bad month it can drop to Y."

2. What debts does each of us have?

Mention student loans, credit cards, car payments and any payment plans, with the monthly amount for each. Debts you each owned before moving in stay yours, unless you both agree otherwise.

"These are mine, this is what I pay each month, and I will keep paying them myself."

3. What savings do we each have?

Say roughly what you have set aside and what it is for. Guides suggest anything from one to six months of costs as an emergency cushion, so treat that as a range, not a rule.

4. What does moving in cost us up front?

Think deposit, first month, removals, furniture, internet set-up. Agree who pays what now and whether the person who pays more up front gets it back later.

Part two: the monthly money

5. How are we splitting rent and bills?

The two usual options are half each, or in proportion to income. Equal is simple when pay is close. Proportional keeps the pinch fair when it is not, and our guide to splitting bills by income shows both side by side.

Here is a worked example. Priya takes home £3,600 a month and Ben £2,400, so Priya earns 60 percent of the pair. Shared costs are £2,150 a month. Figures are an example, not a recommendation.

Equal costs Ben £1,075, which is 45 percent of his pay. By income he pays £860, which is 36 percent, the same share Priya pays of hers.

6. How do we handle accounts?

Common setups are fully separate with bills split, separate plus one joint account for the household, or everything merged. The middle option suits many new couples. Our post on joint vs separate accounts goes deeper.

One caution: in some countries, including the UK, a bank can ask either holder of a joint account to repay a joint overdraft in full. Check how your own bank treats it.

7. Who pays for what, and who tracks it?

Decide who sets up each bill and how you keep score of the small stuff. A shared note works, or a tracking tool. How to split expenses with your partner covers day-to-day ideas, and Evens is built for this (more below).

8. What counts as a big purchase?

Pick a number above which you talk first, such as £150, and stick to it. It stops the sofa surprise.

"If it is over £150 and it is for both of us, we check with each other before buying."

Part three: the future and the "what if"

9. What are we saving for together?

A holiday, a deposit, a rainy-day fund. Pick one goal, an amount per month, and who contributes what.

10. What if one of us cannot pay for a while?

Job loss, illness and a visa gap all happen. Agree now whether the other covers more, for how long, and whether it is a gift or a loan.

11. Whose name is on the lease, and what if we split up?

Being on a lease together usually means you are both responsible for the full rent. Talk about who would stay, who would leave and how you would divide the deposit and furniture. For anything legal, such as a cohabitation agreement, check local rules or ask a professional.

12. When do we check in again?

Put a date in the calendar for about three months out, then every six months. Pay rises, new jobs and rent changes all deserve a quick redo.

Keeping the answers alive

A checklist you agree on and never open again does not help much. The sensible next step is somewhere to log what each of you pays and see who is ahead.

Evens, a shared-expense app, has couple groups where you set each partner's share (say 60/40), track the shared costs and set a shared savings goal. It also shows how to pay, with a Venmo or PayPal link where there is one when it is time to settle up, and it never holds or moves your money.